When I was a little kid the post-Christmas or after-party blues would strike fast. My brother and I were not allowed to play with our new toys or spend our money until we wrote thank you cards for our gifts. It was the worst and we haaaaated Dad for being such a killjoy. He only eased up when we became teenagers saying cards only needed to be sent out for cash gifts.When I got to high school graduation my dad made me do a spread sheet of who sent money, how much, and the date on which I sent the thank you card. (Are you catching on to where I get my Type A personality?) However, by the time I got to college graduation, and then my wedding, I was a thank you card fiend. At holidays and birthdays I write thank yous for money and am mortified if it takes me more than a week to complete the task.
As a child, when I sat agonizing over the appropriate four lines of thanks to include in a card, longingly looking at my toys, Dad would argue that he was doing me a favor because people remember thank you cards and would be more inclined to continue giving gifts if I was courteous. He was right. Recently, we received an invite to a birthday party and I am not keen to attend because not only have we never received a thank you card for past gifts but wedding (WEDDING) gift thank yous were never sent. And just like my dad said: I remember. (Coughcough...OkyouwererightDad.)
Perhaps I am being incredibly old-fashioned, but I know my boys will be tortured with the arduous task of being immediately grateful.
9 comments:
I have always struggled with thank you notes. I am definitely the queen of procrastination. I toy with the idea of implementing your idea with my own children. Simply because if I don't make them do it right away, I forget and it doesn't get done. When your kid doesn't send a thank you, it's the parent that gets blamed. Your dad probably was wanting to teach you a lesson, but he also wanted to make sure his name wasn't dragged through the mud because you forgot.
I became addicted to thank you notes when I graduated from HS. I think they're awesome! Kudos to your dad and kudos to you for passing it down to your boys.
I don't wish to change your mind, because thank you notes really are the best, but when someone doesn't send a thank you note, it's not because they are not grateful, and it's not because they didn't love that you thought of them. It's that they don't know how important a thank you note is to you, and they didn't have a dad like yours who put weight on them. The best way to teach them (and I know this from experience) is to send them one yourself. They'll realize how good it feels to get one, and probably start sending them out as well. If not, at least you did your thing, and you can sleep at night.
I would love to be a type A, by the way.
Just thought of something brilliant.
Okay, so, maybe I should put it on my blog instead of taking up your space.
I am a stickler for the thank you cards... especially as an adult, ESPECIALLY when you received the gift at a milestone event, ie. wedding, baby shower, graduation, etc. You don't receive that many gifts in adulthood and you should take the extra two minutes to let the giver know that you appreciate the time, thought and effort they spent to actually give you a gift. Even though a lot of people don't realize how important thank you cards are, they should bc I think it's rude not to extend the gratitude.
I wouldn't be upset with a child if they didn't write me a thank you card bc kids don't really "get" thank you cards and it's an extension of his/her parents... but I totally LOVE Mr. Hasebe for forcing you to write thank you's.. I will be doing that to my children.
We require thank yous (as I was required when I was a child) but never thought of making her do them before playing with the gifts. Tell your dad thanks for the brilliant idea!
My mom always made us do it to...I still do it and love to buy the cute cards, etc. I have tried to pass this on to William, but in today's time, he thinks an email is OK...I think the art of writing letters has been lost in the world of technology. Email is better than nothing but snail mail rocks!!
I love your post and agree with you 110%! Thank you's are few and far between these days. Common sense, people!
That's funny! I'm the same way about TYs, and I have to admit, when the baby gifts kept rolling in this time around, before I even opened a gift I'd wish it hadn't been sent because I JUST COULDN'T WRITE ANOTHER THANK YOU CARD! But I did.
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